On Tuesdays, things seem to perturb me much more quickly. No reason. Just Tuesday. Here’s my latest list of head-banging-against-the-wall-of-life situations: Trying to save gas by not running the AC in the car, only to arrive at my business meeting with my silk shirt stuck to my back. (Literally.) People who call and leave loooooooong, meandering,Continue reading “Things Driving Me Crazy Today”
Tag Archives: Life
Things My Dad Taught Me
While my mom taught me how to read, write and cheat at Skip-Bo, my dad also contributed to my up-bringing–whether he wants to admit it or not. Here are some important things my dad taught me: How to make Lumpy Dick (Real name. I swear): One of dad’s favorite snacks. Mix flour, boiling water, milk. Eat. (SameContinue reading “Things My Dad Taught Me”
Top 5 Reasons To Become A Hermit
After dealing with the public for decades, I’m putting myself in time out. Forever. My husband thinks I might have a social disorder called Absolutely Sick of Dealing With People Who Piss Me Off. (Or ASODWPWPMO for short.) (In Time Out with Ringo until we can behave properly. Might be a while.) Hermiting (as it’s calledContinue reading “Top 5 Reasons To Become A Hermit”
Fifty Shades of Beige
The popularity of the pornographically-erotic book Fifty Shades of Grey by E.L. James indicates a high level of sexual frustration in women. The book follows the dark relationship between Ana and the hilariously-named Christian, with the expected amount of raw sex. (His skirt looks a little too flowy to be a kilt.) Bodice-rippers are not newContinue reading “Fifty Shades of Beige”
Top 5 Things Men Should Stop Doing
I appreciate women can be difficult. We’re uber-smart, super strong, overly capable and do a variety of activities while wearing six-inch heels and applying lip gloss. But, for some reason, men continue to patronize us while totally ignoring the fact we’re intelligent beings. Here are the top 5 things men should just stop doing. RightContinue reading “Top 5 Things Men Should Stop Doing”
Straight to DVD . . .
With the box-office success of the badly-dialogued Battleship, I thought I’d give board-game-based screenplay writing a try. (Vote for your favorite. I’ll write it, submit it to Hollywood and watch the cash roll in. Mwahahahaha!) Operation: A medieval doctor with a drinking problem operates on patients without anaesthesia. (Well, the patients aren’t anesthetized.) Since Hugh Laurie isContinue reading “Straight to DVD . . .”
Things Driving Me Crazy Today
Wind makes me tense. So does being awake. So when I’m awake on a blustery day, I tend to be easily irritated. Here are the main culprits causing my insanity today. (Wind is NEVER this romantic.) Tank tops with built-in “bras.” Tank top makers, my bosom area doesn’t fit into those stupid built-in Kleenex brasContinue reading “Things Driving Me Crazy Today”
Top 5 Ways to Tell It’s Spring in Utah
Utah is “blessed” to experience all four seasons (deer hunt, basketball, soccer and tourist). But when spring finally arrives (usually around July 22), the weather actually becomes bearable. Translation: I can wear shorts and tank tops without a parka. (You can tell it’s May. Shorts and flip-flops, baby!) Here are the top 5 ways to tell it’sContinue reading “Top 5 Ways to Tell It’s Spring in Utah”
Top 5 Reasons I Hate Tuesdays
Everyone whines and whines about Mondays–but anyone with sense knows the worst day of the week is Tuesday. If the end of the world happens, it will be on a Tuesday. Guaranteed. It’s never a day off work, never a “hump” day and never part of an extended weekend, unless that Monday-night party left you incapacitated.Continue reading “Top 5 Reasons I Hate Tuesdays”
Things Driving Me Crazy Today
I’m usually so mild-mannered and relaxed. But once in a while, my knickers get twisted and I get highly irrational. This is one of those times. These are things twisting my knickers today: North Korea. Just ’cause. My bathroom scale. I’m pretty sure it’s stuck. (I tried bashing it with a hammer, but the numberContinue reading “Things Driving Me Crazy Today”
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