For those of us raised before intrusive regulations, FDA labels, auto safety campaigns, no-smoking ads and boring playgrounds, we lived in a fairytale land of denial and luck. In a previous blog, Proof Our Parents Tried to Kill Us, I addressed the dangerous foods our parents unknowingly (they say) fed us, that should have landed us inContinue reading “More Proof Our Parents Tried to Kill Us”
Tag Archives: Humor
7 Habits of Highly Irritating People
Everyone has irritating habits; those strange little quirks that drive the people around us loco. But some people go above and beyond the label to become habitually irritating. That’s why the term “justifiable homicide” was created. Here are the 7 Habits of Highly Irritating People. Taken individually, they’re tolerable; but collectively?! No eye contact during a discussion.Continue reading “7 Habits of Highly Irritating People”
Top 5 Ways to Tell if You’re a Hoarder
We tend to accumulate stuff. Lots and lots of stuff. As a result, many people start the New Year by throwing stuff away. Unread issues of Reader’s Digest, boxes of Cap’n Crunch that expired in November 2012, bottles of dry shampoo and half-used, dusty, scented candles–they can all go in the trash. But if you’ve clearedContinue reading “Top 5 Ways to Tell if You’re a Hoarder”
My Christmas Wish List
Christmas is a time for making wishes–even those outrageously ludicrous wishes that involve Dunkin Donuts, sweat pants and unlimited calories. So if we’re making unrealistic wishes for Santa to grant, here’s my Christmas list: Dear Santa, I wish that: Repubs and Demos can put their differences aside for the next two years, and actually focusContinue reading “My Christmas Wish List”
Holiday Things Driving Me Crazy
The holiday season is a blur of contradictions. On one hand, we’re celebrating the birth of a man who preached simple, humble living. On the other hand, we spend tons of money buying “As Seen On TV” crap for everyone we’ve ever met in our lives. On Monday we’re dreaming of a White Christmas. And on ThursdayContinue reading “Holiday Things Driving Me Crazy”
Confusing Christmas Lyrics
Nothing makes sense when you’re a kid. And then Christmas comes along, and any remaining sense flies out the window. Exactly what is figgy pudding? And I’d never seen a chestnut, let alone roasted one on an open fire. I always imagined it was similar to Jiffy Pop Popcorn. On top of the regular Christmas confusion, there wereContinue reading “Confusing Christmas Lyrics”
Life and Laughter book–Coming Soon!
Hey All, I know I’ve been slacking for the last few weeks, but I’ve been compiling my favorite “Life and Laughter” columns that I’ve written during the last 10 years, and have produced a BOOK! Yes, a BOOK! It has everything you’d hope for in a book: page numbers, chapters, a back cover–and other surprises!Continue reading “Life and Laughter book–Coming Soon!”
Business Conferences: A Survival Guide for the Socially Stunted
Being alone at a business conference is the worst. Actually, just being at a business conference is the worst. There are strangers everywhere–and they’re trying to communicate with me!! (Activate invisibility cloak.) (Please, don’t make me socialize.) I’ve devised some strategies to survive these business/bonding fests where everyone wants to “get to know you,” andContinue reading “Business Conferences: A Survival Guide for the Socially Stunted”
Things Driving Me Crazy Today
If Tuesday was a superhero, it would be StupidMan. Here’s what’s got my socks in a bunch this Tuesday: When you get out the toaster and the crumb tray opens and spills all over the floor. The man who drove down our street, driving with his left hand, and holding a baby in his rightContinue reading “Things Driving Me Crazy Today”
Are You Too Old To Trick or Treat?
I don’t ask for ID when someone shows up on my doorstep begging for candy–as long as it’s Halloween. I don’t care if you’re a gangsta teen, a middle-aged mom, a 2-day-old baby or even that creepy 30-something guy who’s always hanging around the park. I’ll give anyone candy–because it’s CANDY! Everyone loves candy! ButContinue reading “Are You Too Old To Trick or Treat?”