Peri Kinder

Things Driving Me Crazy Today

Didn’t we just survive Tuesday one week ago? It’s back already? There are only two ways to keep it together on Tuesday: 1) Go back to bed, or 2) hear me whine about what’s driving me crazy today. Standing in line at Café Rio, silently practicing my order. When the dishwasher breaks and I think, that’s okay, washing dishesContinue reading “Things Driving Me Crazy Today”

Concert Stage Fright

I was a teenage mom, so I spent my high school years changing diapers and watching Sesame Street. As a result, I missed the whole “going to a concert” event that, I guess, is some rite of passage into adulthood. During these concerts, certain behaviors are taught that I never had the chance to learn. (IContinue reading “Concert Stage Fright”

It’s. Still. Summer.

There are people out there (yes, I’m talking to you), who love to discuss the waning days of summer; who anticipate the slow dimming of the sun as society returns to a state of hibernation. To these people, I say, “Shut the hell up.” The only thing that gets me through stupid Utah winters, is theContinue reading “It’s. Still. Summer.”

Back to School Tips

Let’s all take a moment to observe a moment of silence as millions of kids return to school after a long summer vacation. Now, let’s raise a glass of champagne that millions of kids have returned to school after a long summer vacation! Parents everywhere are facing that double-emotion “giddy/sad” as they miss their kids,Continue reading “Back to School Tips”

Watching the Parade Go By

I’ve been a dedicated parade attendee for more than four decades. I’m not sure why. It’s not like watching a local parade is the same as enjoying the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade with its bloated, floating cartoon characters. It’s more like watching paint dry. (When the librarians stroll by, pushing book carts, you know you’re watching aContinue reading “Watching the Parade Go By”

Best Signs in New England

Hubbie and I traveled to the East Coast to get away from it all–and wound up lost for several days. Driving around Massachusetts is equivalent to walking through a busy mall blindfolded, finding Nordstrom and selecting the EXACTLY right color of beige socks. Impossible. As we drove aimlessly through what looked like cannibal country, we sawContinue reading “Best Signs in New England”

Top 5 Steps for Handling an Awkward Conversation

We’ve covered the fact that I’m socially-disabled. I went into a sandwich shop for a turkey sub and the professional sandwich maker said she’d gone to high school with me. I’m terrible at remembering faces, so I asked her name. She said, “Remember? I’m so-and-so, from over by the junior high?” The name jiggled my memory slightly, but IContinue reading “Top 5 Steps for Handling an Awkward Conversation”

Things Driving Me Crazy Today

Dear Tuesday, I hope you crack your shins on the coffee table of life. Here are the things driving me crazy today: Feeling like an uneducated redneck at the farmer’s market. Do vendors take classes in snobbishness? Trying on swimming suits. Tip to merchants: light dressing rooms with candles–not flickering fluorescent bulbs. Getting stuck in aContinue reading “Things Driving Me Crazy Today”

Land of The Free

America is a land of contradictions. We have some of the most brilliant scientists in the world, but on the other hand we have . . . well . . . Arkansas. The same country that brought you Cosmos and Planet Earth also presents you with Swamp People and The Bachelor. But that’s what makes AmericaContinue reading “Land of The Free”

Confessions of an Introvert

For readers of my blog, it should come as no surprise that I’m an introvert. With posts like Top 5 Reasons to Become a Hermit, Stores That Overwhelm Me, The Holiday Party Survival Guide or Reasons to Stay in Bed Today, you really should have guessed. But being an introvert does not mean I’m mousy, shy or a littleContinue reading “Confessions of an Introvert”