February 18 was Ash Wednesday and the beginning of Lent. Because I live in a state overrun with Mormons who don’t observe this tradition, most people here just know Lent involves a dirty smudge on the forehead and a big party on Fat Tuesday. Typically, Lent requires faithful Christians of the Lutheran, Methodist or Catholic persuasionContinue reading “Things I’m Giving Up For Lent”
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You Might Have Alzheimer’s If . . .
I watched the movie “Still Alice” over the weekend. It stars Julianne Moore as a woman diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s and it’s depressing as s***. But, like when I watch most disease-focused movies, I began to wonder if I was afflicted with this degenerative illness. I’ve been convinced I’ve had ALS (The Theory of Everything),Continue reading “You Might Have Alzheimer’s If . . .”
Weird February Traditions
I guess people who survive January decide February is a great time to celebrate. But there’s really nothing to celebrate in February, so people just decided to make s*** up. Take for instance: Groundhog Day (2-2): Yesterday, all across the country, innocent groundhogs were pulled from their warm burrows with the demand that they forecastContinue reading “Weird February Traditions”
More Proof Our Parents Tried to Kill Us
For those of us raised before intrusive regulations, FDA labels, auto safety campaigns, no-smoking ads and boring playgrounds, we lived in a fairytale land of denial and luck. In a previous blog, Proof Our Parents Tried to Kill Us, I addressed the dangerous foods our parents unknowingly (they say) fed us, that should have landed us inContinue reading “More Proof Our Parents Tried to Kill Us”
7 Habits of Highly Irritating People
Everyone has irritating habits; those strange little quirks that drive the people around us loco. But some people go above and beyond the label to become habitually irritating. That’s why the term “justifiable homicide” was created. Here are the 7 Habits of Highly Irritating People. Taken individually, they’re tolerable; but collectively?! No eye contact during a discussion.Continue reading “7 Habits of Highly Irritating People”
Top 5 Ways to Tell if You’re a Hoarder
We tend to accumulate stuff. Lots and lots of stuff. As a result, many people start the New Year by throwing stuff away. Unread issues of Reader’s Digest, boxes of Cap’n Crunch that expired in November 2012, bottles of dry shampoo and half-used, dusty, scented candles–they can all go in the trash. But if you’ve clearedContinue reading “Top 5 Ways to Tell if You’re a Hoarder”
My Christmas Wish List
Christmas is a time for making wishes–even those outrageously ludicrous wishes that involve Dunkin Donuts, sweat pants and unlimited calories. So if we’re making unrealistic wishes for Santa to grant, here’s my Christmas list: Dear Santa, I wish that: Repubs and Demos can put their differences aside for the next two years, and actually focusContinue reading “My Christmas Wish List”
Confusing Christmas Lyrics
Nothing makes sense when you’re a kid. And then Christmas comes along, and any remaining sense flies out the window. Exactly what is figgy pudding? And I’d never seen a chestnut, let alone roasted one on an open fire. I always imagined it was similar to Jiffy Pop Popcorn. On top of the regular Christmas confusion, there wereContinue reading “Confusing Christmas Lyrics”
Life and Laughter book–Coming Soon!
Hey All, I know I’ve been slacking for the last few weeks, but I’ve been compiling my favorite “Life and Laughter” columns that I’ve written during the last 10 years, and have produced a BOOK! Yes, a BOOK! It has everything you’d hope for in a book: page numbers, chapters, a back cover–and other surprises!Continue reading “Life and Laughter book–Coming Soon!”
Business Conferences: A Survival Guide for the Socially Stunted
Being alone at a business conference is the worst. Actually, just being at a business conference is the worst. There are strangers everywhere–and they’re trying to communicate with me!! (Activate invisibility cloak.) (Please, don’t make me socialize.) I’ve devised some strategies to survive these business/bonding fests where everyone wants to “get to know you,” andContinue reading “Business Conferences: A Survival Guide for the Socially Stunted”
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