Against my better judgement, I recently spent a wonderfully pleasant afternoon at the local emergency room being poked and prodded. Cost: $250. Diagnosis: A shrug of the shoulders and a “Who knows?” Sitting in my lovely hospital gown, I pondered all the reasons I hate hospitals and came up with the following list: #1. UrineContinue reading “Top 5 Reasons I Hate the Hospital”
Author Archives: Peri Kinder
Things Driving Me Crazy Today
I consider myself a patient person–usually. But some days things happen that test my sanity level, which isn’t high to begin with. Things driving me crazy today include: My cholesterol level is the lowest it’s been in years!! However, my blood sugar level is up. I’m convinced it’s all the sappy romantic-comedies my hubbie makesContinue reading “Things Driving Me Crazy Today”
Top 5 Reasons Utah’s Liquor Laws Are Screwed Up
Utah has a well-earned reputation for having screwed-up liquor laws. Thank heavens state officials are perpetuating that reputation. Our guv just appointed another non-drinker to the Utah Department of Alcoholic Beverage Control. That’s like putting a non-driver in charge of transportation. Or a virgin in charge of brothel regulation. Just sayin’. Anyway, here are the top 5 reasonsContinue reading “Top 5 Reasons Utah’s Liquor Laws Are Screwed Up”
Book Review: Short Stories
I’m really not a fan of short stories. I guess I’m just not intellectual enough to understand things that are brief and vague. I need things spelled out for me in novel length. However, the short stories in “Swim Back to Me” by Ann Packer were well-written tales of loss and heartbreak, and the day-to-dayContinue reading “Book Review: Short Stories”
Buckle Up
If you’ve driven past my car and I stared out at you from the passenger seat with a terrified expression, understand I wasn’t afraid of you–but of my chauffeur: My teenage daughter. In December, the State of Utah decided my daughter should be given a learner’s permit based on the fact that she’s breathing andContinue reading “Buckle Up”
Must Dos for Summer
I can’t believe July is more than half over!! Summer just isn’t complete until I’ve accomplished each thing on this list. What are your favorite summer traditions? Must dos for summer: Sit in a park and read a good book. Eat buttery corn on the cob and not care if my face is covered withContinue reading “Must Dos for Summer”
Sleepless in Seattle
Day 1: May the Forks Be With You My husband,Tom, surprised me with a trip to the Pacific Northwest for my birthday. (I think he was looking for a remote location to bury my body.) On Friday, we landed in Seattle and drove the scenic town of Port Angeles, Washington. If you’ve never been to PortContinue reading “Sleepless in Seattle”
Top 5 Reasons to Avoid Getting Old
Yep. Today’s my birthday. As much as I love presents, cake and adoration from my friend and most of my family members, I don’t want to get any older. But I don’t want to die, either. Kind of a lose-lose situation. I haven’t reached the hearing aid, support hose, wandering off, false teeth, stool softeners,Continue reading “Top 5 Reasons to Avoid Getting Old”
State of Emergency
In June’s Life and Laughter column, I discussed my plans to get prepared for emergencies: man-made, natural, teenage meltdown or low blood sugar. My 72-hour kit was sorely lacking in anything helpful, so I decided to start from scratch. Luckily, those wacky wacksters at the Centers for Disease Control helped me out by posting their ZombieContinue reading “State of Emergency”
Top 5 Reasons to Get Off Facebook
You know you’ll never do it. I won’t either. But if you’re looking for reasons to delete your Facebook account, here’s a few to ponder. (Note: it’s physically impossible to delete your account. Layers of pissed-off warning boxes jump at you when you try to leave and eventually Mark Zuckerberg–or it might be Jesse Eisenberg–will personallyContinue reading “Top 5 Reasons to Get Off Facebook”
perikinder.com 