writing

Embracing the Darkness (With Mashed Potatoes)

It’s not a good sign when a season has its own mental disorder, but here we are, entering the dark, cold, abysmal days of post-Daylight Saving Time when Seasonal Affective Disorder destroys all joy. Darkness descends like a roiling thunderstorm in a fantasy novel, erasing all sunshine and leaving us cowering in the cellar. MyContinue reading “Embracing the Darkness (With Mashed Potatoes)”

A Puppet Regime

It took decades, but Ronald Grump finally found a way to evict the residents of 123 Sesame Street. Grump (played by Joe Pesci) visited the TV show in 1994 with plans to demolish the beloved neighborhood to build Grump Tower. Sesame Street doubled-down in 2005 when a selfish, orange-haired muppet, Donald Grump, tried to hireContinue reading “A Puppet Regime”

O Tidings of Comfort Annoy

Now that Facebook has become a year-round newsletter, packed with enough posts to make us feel miserable all year long, can we finally call it quits on those dreadful holiday letters? I understand a family newsletter can be a highlight of the season, recapping all your adventures with witty repartee and candy cane clip art,Continue reading “O Tidings of Comfort Annoy”

Questions I’m Often Asked

Now that I’m a super-famous blogger, I’m always getting stopped in the street and asked questions. Usually those questions are along the lines of, “Can you get out of my way, ma’am?” or “What the hell are you doing?” but once in a while, someone surprises me with a true inquiry. Because I don’t knowContinue reading “Questions I’m Often Asked”

Top 5 Ways to Make Money With Your Sweet Writing Skills

Yes, I know your heart’s desire is to write the next best-selling young adult fantasy trilogy that involves a love triangle between a goblin, a unicorn and a pair of comfy slippers but, not to dash your dreams into a glacier of cold reality, it’s probably not gonna happen. (Are they assuming you’re writing for young adult dummies?Continue reading “Top 5 Ways to Make Money With Your Sweet Writing Skills”

Top 5 Reasons Writing Sucks

I’ve been writing since I learned to eat a pencil eraser. I moved on from chewing pencils to eating pen caps, sniffing markers and giving myself ink tattoos with a Bic during history class. Then came “typing,” “keyboarding” or whatever the hell it’s called today. (Remember typing so fast the keys stuck? Yeah, I’m thatContinue reading “Top 5 Reasons Writing Sucks”