How I Got Addicted To Pinterest

Hello, I’m Peri, and I’m a Pinterest addict.

(Pinterest: The act of sorting the entire Internet into categories.)

When I first tried Pinteresting, I was sure I could handle it. I could stop scrolling after a few re-pins and walk away from my computer. For a while it was okay. But I started thinking about Pinterest all the time.

What was I missing? Was there a cool Thanksgiving craft I would never know about? Was there a your-ecard that would make me laugh until I peed myself? Was there a photo of a lion fighting a dolphin, saying something hilarious?

I needed a Pinterest hit.

(I found this cake on . . . wait for it . . . Pinterest!)

I started hiding my habit. I’d have Facebook tabbed so I could jump to it if anyone walked in the room so they wouldn’t see me scrolling and scrolling and scrolling, pinning, re-pinning, liking, commenting. I stopped sleeping. I would have stopped eating but everything on Pinterest makes me hungry.

My husband expressed concern for my mental health, worried I spent too much time on this cyber-bulletin board. I told him something like, “Shut the hell up!!!! I’m just fine!! Leave the room!!!”

Cooking tips. Craft ideas. Holiday gifts. Fashionable outfits. Zany quotes. Cute animal pics. Funny photos. Beauty tips. Fifty things to do with toilet paper rolls. How to braid a loaf of bread. Cupcakes that look like gingerbread houses. 75 ways to incorporate bacon into your day. How to do a “smoky” eye. There was just NO END to the things I could learn!!

(Information overload!!)

Finally, after a Pinterest session that lasted 17 hours, my husband slapped me, shut down the computer and rolled me into the shower. The blast of cold water brought me back to my senses–but all I could think about was Pinteresting.

My husband staged a Pintervention and pressed a brochure into my shaky hands, “How to Have a Healthy Interest in Pinterest.” I started to cry. I knew he was right. And I was crying because I hate it when he’s right.

Now I’m in recovery. But it’s not easy. I suffer from Pinsomnia. I admit, I sneak a quick hit every now and then, but it’s nothing. I can handle it. Right?

Right?

Tell me I’ll be okay!!!

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Are You a Tech Addict?

My laptop screen blew out last week. No warning. Just a great big “I’m not working! Hahahahahaha!!”

(Not an actual re-creation. Mine was much worse.)

So, off to the electronic super store I went where the Geek Squad tried to convince me I should upgrade my computer. I was adamant that I just needed access to the Internet, iTunes and a word processor. Nearly $800 later, I stumbled out of the store, disoriented from talk about RAMs, processors, time-warp, etc.

Here’s the thing: we’ve become WAY too dependent on machines doing our thinking for us. The week I didn’t have a laptop I folded laundry, dusted end tables, made cookies (DELICIOUS), brushed my teeth, took longer walks with my dog and taught my grandson how to swear. Of course, since I work from home, I didn’t get paid for any of that . . .

Anyway. Here are some signs you might be too dependent on technology:

  • You don’t go ANYWHERE without your iPhone. Not even the bathroom. In fact, you have several photos of yourself staring into the bathroom mirror.
  • You not only text while you’re driving, you also play Words With Friends, download the latest Justin Bieber tune and update your FB status.
  • You have a stupid Bluetooth implanted in your brain.

(I guess it could be worse.)

  • Your best friends are only found on Facebook. The last time you spoke with a real person face-to-face was when you bought your new iPad.
  • You talk in text speak. LOL! B4N! TTTH!
  • You know what the above acronyms mean.
  • You haven’t picked up a real book, magazine or newspaper since 2009.

(These are books. They have pages you can turn. Sometimes they have pictures.)

  • You’ve given up physical interaction in exchange for sexting.
  • If the Internet crashed permanently, you would consider drinking a Drano daiquiri.
  • You’ve dumped a boyfriend/girlfriend via text or email.
  • You don’t know the phone numbers of your closest friends or family members. They’re all on speed-dial.

Maybe take some time to rethink your relationship with your gadgets. If you have forgotten what “nature” is, you might want to put the phone down. Now.