Another Tuesday has rolled around, and like all Tuesdays, I just want to sleep until it’s over. If I get out of bed, something bad will happen. I’ll break my toenail, get an unexpected bill in the mail, misplace the dog or end up dangling off a cliff somewhere in the Andes.

(How did this happen? Oh, right. It’s Tuesday.)

No matter how my day starts, by Tuesday night I’m a heap o’ mess.

So I’ve created a list of reasons I can stay in bed today–guilt-free! (Or as guilt-free as a mother/wife/employee can ever stay in bed without a terminal illness.)

• I’m afraid if I’ll get out of bed, I’ll see my shadow and have to stay awake for six straight weeks.
• If I leave the house, I’ll have to talk to people.
• I need to sulk for a while.

(I’ll stop sulking when it’s Wednesday.)

• I have a new book/magazine/blog/newspaper to read!
• There are too many dirty clothes to deal with if I get up.
• If I get out of bed, someone’s going to want something.
• It’s snowing. In April. In Utah.
• If I stay in bed, maybe someone will think I’m sick and bring me dinner.
• I’m just copying my dog.

(Dog days of Tuesday.)

It’s Tuesday. ’nuff said.