Top 5 Important Body Parts for Writers

There are specific body parts that writers need in order to create inspirational, humorous, or brilliant literary works of art. You’d think those body parts would include fingers or hands. You would be incorrect. Several other body parts are seriously engaged in the writing process, and writers would be lost without them.

(Fingers, by themselves, can’t do s***.)

In no order of importance:

Fingernails: Writers need fingernails to drum on the table while they ponder their next brilliant sentence. The longer the nails, the better for drumming, my dear. (Studies show the most common rhythm tapped on desks is “Shave and a haircut, two bits.” I guess it’s a writer thing.) (You know you totally just did it.)

Elbows: It’s important to rest your elbow (or elbows) on your desk, with your hand(s) under your chin(s) as you stare at a computer screen, waiting for inspiration to hit. Without elbows, you’d have to rest your chin on the desk–and that’s way too much effort.

(I can’t tell if she’s resting on her elbows or pulling out her hair. Either way, she must be a writer.)

Butt/Tush: I know studies show that sitting for long periods of time is hazardous to your health. But if writers didn’t have butts to sit on, we would certainly find another way to slouch through our assignments. Lying on the floor comes to mind–only because I’m lying on the floor.

Forehead: When writer’s block hits (and don’t tell me it doesn’t exist!) your forehead is invaluable. You can slap your forehead with the palm of your hand (important body part #6) or, in extreme situations, pound your head against the nearest wall. That jarring motion always shakes something loose so ideas can flow again.

(Forehead is also necessary for doing any facepalms while frustrated.)

Mouth: Not only do writers mumble while they’re working but many writers like to read their work out loud (mostly so they can say they held a “reading” with their work.) The mouth is also necessary for shoving food into (chips, cookies, Hershey’s Kisses, donuts, etc.) when writers get tired of doing their job. (Teeth, tongue and lips are included in this category.)

So as you’re writing the next great American novel (or blog post), notice which body parts you haven’t thanked recently, and make it a point to do something nice for those parts. Like give them all a nap.